This post took me a week and a half to write, so it’s sort of all over the place.

As of last Thursday, Urijah hit the one month old mark! (As of today, he’s 5.5 weeks.) It seems a lot shorter to me to say 4 weeks, but when I start thinking in terms of ‘months’, I can hardly believe it.  We’re only 2 weeks away from reaching the end of the famed “the first 6 weeks are the hardest” saying.  And really, I must say, in a lot of ways it has been true, but it has also been better, dare I say, easier than I expected.

The hardest part of the last 4 weeks has been the feeding issues that we were facing early on.  We seem to have settled into a new normal of breastfeeding and supplementing (with both formula and Lisa’s milk) and while it isn’t ideal (I desperately wish I could exclusively breastfeed this baby, but I’m coming to terms with the fact that I can’t provide enough, and I need to make sure his belly is full, first and foremost, so supplementing it is!), it is what we have to do and he is thriving and putting on weight, and that’s what matters.  We just switched to Dr. Brown’s bottles two days ago…we were using Green to Grow bottles from the start but he was spitting up quite a bit, so we’re trying different bottles to see if that helps.  So far so good, he still spits up a bit, but it is definitely less than it was.

I hesitate to put it in writing in case I am jinxing myself, but the sleep has been pretty good so far.  AND I AM HUGELY GRATEFUL FOR THAT, powers that be.  Do you hear me?   I’m not taking it for granted!  Urijah regularly sleeps for stretches of 4-6 hours at a time at night, and so far, goes back to sleep pretty easily after eating. I’m starting to see a pattern emerging of nap times and awake times during the day, so that helps, too.  If I know he will go to sleep for a couple of hours and I can eat something, wash bottles and clean up the kitchen, it can make the whole day feel like a win.  Like I know what I’m doing.

It was a rough first 2 weeks of self doubt, though…I was frustrated and disappointed, and the emotional roller-coaster was a bit unpredictable.  It feels like it is leveling out somewhat now, but I still reserve the right to have a cry if I need to.  Just FYI.

So…now here are some first month ‘stats’.  The lactation consultant left her fancy scale here for almost 2 weeks, so I was able to keep tabs on Urijah’s weight…he hit the 7 lb mark and even exceeded it a bit!  His face and belly are noticeably fuller, and he is starting to get that chubby baby look to him.  Don’t get me wrong, he’s still tiny and a bit scrawny, but compared to how tiny he was at the beginning, it’s a big change!

He has more and more awake time during the day (and yeah, at night, too) and his little eyes are so bright and alert.  He is making eye contact and I feel like he might be on the cusp of smiling soon.  I keep trying to talk him into it, but he’s not cooperating yet.  He can hold his head up really well when you hold him up on your shoulder…he loves to look all around, especially at lights or the TV or at your face.  But watch out – he tends to overdo it sometimes and I’ve already had several hard collisions with his forehead and my lip.  We’re working on tummy time – he can move his head from side to side, but not very much consistent head holding up in that position yet.

And I would like to officially extend an apology to every mother that I ever (silently) judged for saying that they didn’t have time to do something.  I get it now.  I’m sorry I ever doubted you.  This kid takes ALOT of time.



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